So, guess what. Another weekend is over. Did you do anything mildly productive? If so, good. But did you do anything for yourself? Did you go on that hike? Did you get to the Botanical Garden to paint? No? Well, make it happen sometime soon. There's tons of time for you to lounge in your room with your laptop getting your homework done. You need to get out a little more especially when the weather is so nice!
Good job talking to your parents yesterday about that internship opportunity. I know they didn't have the same reaction as your sisters did, but they're still happy for you deep down even if they don't know how to show or express it. Know something else? You're getting better at overcoming your fear of them. You're 21 now. You have a bit more responsibility. I think you can go ahead and ask to go to San Diego for a longer weekend, rather than a single day like the original plan is. Rejection sucks, but if you want independence, you need to stick your neck out some more and voice your wants and needs. You may be the youngest girl in the family, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't have privileges to stretch your wings and fly.
While we're talking about those internship opportunities, I want to tell you that you've come a long way from last year. You were timid, hated cover letters and resumes because you didn't know how to write them or didn't think your experience was worth it. Megan, you made a good decision taking two classes this semester that would help you out with that and more. Now you feel like a pro! You have come so far from getting frustrated at not finding anything online, to calling around to places who probably wouldn't have offered internships otherwise and made your own position. That is so wonderful.
At this point in the semester, midterms are coming up and you're feeling a bit overwhelmed. You might not know where to focus next. But right now, just focus on what is near at hand. All the prep work is done, just get going. Check those assignments and projects off your list one by one. They look like looming monsters from afar, but really, they're just little creatures easily overcome when it comes down to it. And even though housing plans for next semester have fallen through, you've been given the okay to seek out an alternative. It will all fall into place.
Something else: take care of yourself. Get rid of that cough you're sporting. Eat more and eat better. Drink more water. If you hate city water so much, then get bottled water. Next time you're at the store, get some fruit. Your body needs it. And don't worry about exercising to tone up. You're fine the way you are. In fact, you're more than fine. You're beautiful.
Back to what I was saying at the beginning, don't be so lazy. You might feel unmotivated, but all you need to do is work on a schedule, a rhythm. Once you get it all figured out, you'll have more time to do the things you want to when you want to. Just because you feel uninspired doesn't mean you should waste your time.
I guess I just want to finish this, Megan, by saying that you are stronger now than you have ever been. Embrace that. Embrace your beautiful heart that will lift you into all the right places. Just gotta spread your wings and go.
Dragonfly by Tom Clifton